…Until it’s Gone


 Don’t it always seem to go
That you don’t know what you’ve got
Til its gone

-Joni Mitchell

Today is the first day of Minnesota’s house arrest. Or shelter in place, I guess is the correct description.

I do agree with this mandate, and I hope it is effective and does indeed lift in two weeks.  We all want to virus to stop spreading and we all want our routines back.  This has changed all of our lives in uncountable ways.  Some are trivial in retrospect and some are beyond our worst fears.

Life has a way of showing us of how lucky we are, and how much we have, and this reminder usually comes from us losing what we took for granted.

As a t-girl, I often feel restricted from what I am “allowed” to wear, and I often feel that I must fit within societal gender norms.  I am used to being held back.  But at the same time, these days I am reflecting on how much I have, and how much I took for granted.  I may not be able to go out en femme whenever I want, but I always was able to find time to get my eyebrows done or go shopping for a new dress.  Even the MN T-Girls had our monthly outing canceled for March.

I hope you all are staring safe and staying sane.

What’s the first thing you are going to do once this passes?  I think I am hitting the mall and buying every dress I can find.

Love, Hannah



4 thoughts on “…Until it’s Gone

  1. First thing from a T point of view? Catch up with friends and see how everyone is.

    As to shopping, much as getting out is rather good, there’s still online in the meantime.

    Stay safe,
    L x


  2. We’re in a strict lockdown in Wisconsin ourselves, and I’ve stayed in my home since the 17th. It’s not fun not being able to go out and meet with our community.

    Hannah, has your group been able to meet online in lieu of in-person activities? A support group I’m part of has been trying to do this. Even if it’s virtual, any meeting can be so beneficial.


  3. Not sure what will be on the list of activities once this lifts. I’ll have to see what is pressing by then.

    In the mean time, I’m taking this time to go 24/7. For weekdays, I’ll be “getting ready to go to work”, even though it’s just work at home. Practice for the future, if you will.

    I hope everyone is staying safe through this trying time.



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