Hi Hannah, Is it all possible to fight the urge to crossdress? I have never crossdressed fully but I have always had the desire and it seems the urge gets stronger. Is there any way to fight it?
I don’t think there is such a thing as “crossdressing fully”. You’re either wearing something (nail polish, panties, makeup) that society typically considers “for girls” or you’re not. As I type this I am wearing a boy t-shirt, femme leggings, a femme cardigan, and panties (if that isn’t too much information). Am I crossdressing now? Absolutely. I woke up in a nightgown. Was I crossdressing while I slept? Absolutely. This weekend I have a makeover scheduled and I am excited to wear my new wig and one of my new outfits. Will I be crossdressing then? Absolutely.
As for fighting the urge to crossdress, well, I suppose it’s possible. It never was possible for me. You can deny and ignore this part of you, but you will never stop wanting to crossdress. This is not a phase, this is not something you will outgrow.
But the question I have for you is why would you want to fight it? Why deny a part of who you are? Panties, dresses, lingerie, makeup… everything is absolutely wonderful. Clothes are how I express one of my gender identities, but even if it wasn’t, I would still wear lingerie and leggings and nightgowns and…the list goes on. “Girl clothes” are amazing.
There is nothing wrong with crossdressing.There is nothing wrong with who you are.
Yes, society and many people think it’s weird or whatever, but who cares? I think it’s weird when dudes spend all day in a boat in the middle of the lake trying to catch a fish. same with wandering around a golf course and trying to whack a little white ball. But if it makes them happy, who am I to judge? You can’t suppress this part of you because some people think it’s not normal. I don’t know and I don’t care what other people think of me, no matter what I am doing or wearing, in either of my genders.
Fighting and denying this part of you can be dangerous. Some people turn to drinking to escape the stressful parts of their life, whether it is their job or their gender identity. It’s not healthy to be at war with yourself. Life is hard enough as it is. You don’t need you to make it any more challenging. I don’t want to say that it’s pointless to fight this urge, but it’s… kind of pointless to fight this urge. It won’t go away, it will always be there, and there’s nothing wrong with this side of you. I don’t even think it’s an urge. This is who you are. This is who we are.
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6 thoughts on “Ask Hannah!”
Thank you, my panties are alot more comfortable!!
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When I was five years old (back in 1971) I thought it was weird if a woman liked baseball, or worked as a mechanic, or sported a tattoo. Almost fifty years later, all of these things are in the realm of normal.
Wearing these beautiful clothes feels “right” to me, just as it is for some women and not for others. I don’t like the term “cross dresser” I prefer “skirt enthusiast”. Wearing skirts and all the delightful things that go with them just makes sense to me. My advice? Follow your heart. It will never steer you wrong
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Hannah, I love being me! It’s the others in the world that don’t like me, well that’s their loss. I suspect the reason this person is asking for ways to fight it because they absolutely hate it! I have known some individuals who unfortunately who could/would not deal with this problem and have unfortunately ended it all. It’s sad to think there are some people out there like this.
well written . i agree the more you fight it the more it builds up.. Be who you are .
i love my leggings, skirts, panties and bras.
I spent about 36 years denying, pretending, and thinking this wasn’t me. Did things to myself far more damaging then drinking to try and make it go away. Now I see me, the real me, and feel immense joy! As Hannah said this is who we are; as much as one can given their circumstances, live it…with all you have. Be beautiful, be free, be ourselves!
I agree this isn’t something you can just turn off like the lights. I have tried as i’m sure many of us have over the years to “escape” from these feelings and no matter what they seem to rope me back in.
Embracing who you are is one of the most liberating experiences you can have, but as with anything else in life it is prudent to approach it carefully. If the questioner here is needing to suppress these feelings for their own safety then that is what is best for them.
I know personally I love wearing the bras, panties, leggings, forms, and dresses and feel comfortable in them. I also know that where I live there are far too many openly bigoted people for it to be safe to just go out in what I am comfortable in( pandemic or no.)
I think what I am trying to say is that even though we should be who we are and be proud and comfortable about it, we should not discount that some people out there like us may not be able to safely express themselves like we do. If these people are looking for advice then just telling them to not try to hide or suppress or ignore isn’t going to help them in a meaningful way.