I would like to know about some resources for looking more feminine
There are two answers to this question. One is very, very, very long.
But I am going to take the easy way out and respond with a different question.
The long answer would be an sprawling list of links that provide resources for makeup, clothes, wigs, heels, shapewear, forms, and many other things that can be used for a traditionally femme presentation. Although this list would be very long I am not sure how helpful it would be. And I am not using that as an excuse to avoid writing a very long response. I think a list like that would be overwhelming.
What is more helpful is, well, narrowing it down a little (or a lot). So, my question to you is, “What is your goal?”
And the goal CAN’T be “I want to look more feminine”. If it is, well, I don’t REALLY know how to help. Everyone, cis or trans, has their own definition of what looking feminine is. For me, and for myself only, I feel I look feminine in heels and a dress and makeup. For others, it’s a cute tank top and leggings and flip flops. If you ask any girl about how to look feminine you will get a lot of different answers.
When I go from boy mode to girl mode there are a lot of small and a lot of big things I do. It’s more than just a wardrobe change. It’s how my makeup is done because I contour my face to give an appearance a rounder, softer (i.e. more feminine) look which is different from my squarish, masculine shape. This is not to say that this is a shape ALL femme presenting people need to have, this is what I want to have when I want to look femme. This perspective, this opinion is my own and for my own face.
Crossdressing takes time, patience, and money. Not everyone has these resources, particularly money. Not everyone can afford a two hundred corset or four hundred breast forms. Do these things help me look and feel more feminine? Yes. But again, this is what helps me feel and look more femme. No girls needs to have an hourglass figure or have a shapely body to be femme.
Going from masculine to feminine is a PROCESS. A huge process that consists of a lot of small steps. Start with something specific. Perhaps think of this as, well, sections. For example:
“I want a more feminine face because I think my jawline is too masculine. How do I use makeup to contour my face?”
“My shoulders are very broad, how do I minimize them?”
“I want to wear a corset so I can have a shapelier body. How do I wear one?”
“What size breast forms should I get?”
“What wig is the right style for my face?”
Does that make sense? I know at the end of the day many of us want to look more feminine and that goal can be overwhelming. I think breaking it down into small steps makes all of this a lot more manageable.
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4 thoughts on “Ask Hannah!”
Lucille Sorella website Femme Secrets just listed 12 online sites for M to F resources for clothing, etc.
It’s a big topic as you say, Hannah. If I may add to your comment about a goal, it’s thinking on the style that you might aim for. That may be influenced (tempered?) by our age, body shape, budget, time, and the other things you mention.
FWIW, I tend to lean towards looking at what women of my age wear and when. That and looking at advice on “dressing with broad shoulders” or “how to hide a big tummy” type of thing. That certainly give ideas on styles and if nothing else, show you just how many different body types people come in. Variety is beautiful ❤️
My personal world view separates “feminine” from “female”. I can put on a pretty dress on my obviously male body and immediately feel somewhat feminine. Or I can shave everything, wear a padded bra, wig, makeup and heels, and feel like I have reached a level of femininity that many, but not all, females aspire to reach to fulfill an expected gender role.
Most of my appearances as the more feminine version of myself are just my male self in a dress, jewelry and cute shoes. And why not? I don’t need to be female to indulge in the wonderful art of wearing dresses.
Hi Hanna, Its Magan
My question is how would you deal with a woman that has transed and is very passionate about the transitioning prosess. I am a 67 year old who has found the best of both lives. I have just been out in full enfeme for the first time to the mall and had a visit with my hair dressers in there shop, i was welcomed with opened arms one actually gave me curles that day, i have my own long hair. it was fun but no pink fog. but back to the original question. I was out to visit the person who actually aloud
me to use her shop for a small wood project, but she was still trying to see what i wanted out of being enfeme, but still pushing to go for full transition. i told her why would i want to (all I can say is to put it bluntly its hearse) all i can think of why would i want to change a perfectly healthy body when i can have the best of both genders. she still cant figure it out.
How would you deal with someone like that?