Hi!
I am on my last work trip of the summer so I have scheduled this post in advance. Same with Monday’s. I love scheduling posts because it gives off a little “I am posting this from beyond the grave!” or “By the time you read this, I will be dead. Or in Arizona” vibe.
I’m not really in Arizona. I just think it’s funny to say that I put the AZ in Arizona.
It just occured to me that ‘I put the ass in Massachusetts’ is way funnier but that’s showbiz, baby.
Anyway, It’s been a very busy summer between work travel and other obligations. I’ve had little femme time. Beyond the monthly MN T-Girls events all of my Saturdays this summer have required me to be in male mode.
If you bounce back and forth between gender presentations as I do, you realize how important it is to be you, to be all of you, to be both of you. We have to nurture HER. We need to take care of HER. We need HER to express HERSELF.
When I had time to be Hannah this summer I realized just how much I missed her, how much I needed her, and how much I loved her.
Yes, it wounds like SHE is another person but it’s kind of true. I mean, different name, pronouns, friends, wardrobe… I feel like another person when I am her. Of course, she is another aspect of who I am as a person, but it’s not unlike spending time with a friend you haven’t seen in a while. Like you end the evening telling them that you really needed this.
I hope you are at peace with who you are. I know it’s not easy and not possible for all of us. Lately I am being reminded of how short life is, as well as how fulfilling it can be. The life we want is never given to us. It must be found, it must be created. It must be nurtured.
Love, Hannah
Hannah McKnight 