Keep Your Heels High and Your Head Higher

I get a lot of emails from other t-girls who haven’t made the step outside their house yet.  Usually it’s for a few different reasons, but it all seems to come down to them afraid of what other people will think.

This is a perfectly natural thing to wonder and I’ve been there too.  But what helped me leave my living room was that I just… felt ready.  I was so ready to experience the world as Hannah that this feeling became stronger than any fear I had about leaving my home.  I wondered what people would think and then I realized something.

You won’t know what people will think.

Unless, of course, you ask them, I suppose, but what would the point of that be?  I have never felt the need to stop someone at Target, in either gender, and ask them what they thought about me.

Of course, some people will share their opinion without being prompted but in my experience I hear more unprompted compliments than detraction.

But my point is that people are usually too distracted by their own lives (and phones) to notice you or have an opinion.  When I’m out (in either gender) I am too busy thinking about a million different things to think about anyone else.

That’s not to say I am not aware of who I am around for safety reasons, but I pay so little attention to the guy who’s watching me walk through the mall to even speculate as to what he might be thinking.

Remember, it’s not what people say to you, it’s how you react to what they say to you.

Once I walked down the street and one guy said to his friend “dude looks like a lady” when he saw me.  There’s a few different ways I could interpret his comment and it’s possible it wasn’t even an insult.  It may very well have been, but the point is that I don’t know and I’ll never know.  It wasn’t worth my time to stop and ask.

I could have let this ruin my day but I looked too good to let anything get to me.

No.  My first reaction was “well, that’s the point”.

The sidewalk is my catwalk.  My heels are high but I held my head higher.  I rolled my eyes and strutted on.

Love, Hannah

 

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3 thoughts on “Keep Your Heels High and Your Head Higher

  1. Hanna,
    I have been out dressed a few times and it is an exhilarating experience, well worth the possibility of being ridiculed by girls in the mall.
    Kerry

    Like

  2. You won’t know what people think, and it doesn’t matter. What you remember is how they behave towards you, and how they behave depends on the cues you give them, and the cues you give them reflect how you expect them to behave.
    There was a lightbulb moment when this dawned on me: I was in a lift (elevator) and it stopped at a floor and a woman got in. She clocked me and carefully looked me up and down. And I realised my reaction wasn’t “Oh damn, she’s clocked me”, it was “How rude of her to look at me like that”. And when we reached the ground floor, I held my head up, stuck my tits out and marched out in front of her.

    Like

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