Month: August 2020

Ask Hannah!

by Hannah

How are you able to keep your real identity confidential? I have gone out with my wife en femme a couple of times in the last month (I’m very blessed to have a willing spouse) on girl friend dates and wonder what would happen if someone needs to see my license (show my ID) or need to use a rest room and a family restroom is not near by?

When I am out en femme, I always make sure I have enough cash for what I will be doing that day. Very rarely has Hannah needed to use “his” credit card. When I have needed to do so in the past, I have usually swiped it myself but I have needed to hand it to the salesclerk as well. This used to cause me a great deal of anxiety but I don’t think about it too much. For starters, anyone who sees me in the real world knows I am trans, so me handing them a credit card with a boy name on it isn’t that surprising to them. Salesclerks and cashiers also see a hundreds of customers a day, so it’s unlikely they will remember the name on a credit card that one customer used.

Also, I am not anyone famous or well-known or… anything in my male life. If I told you my boy name it’s incredibly unlikely you’ve heard of me. And why would you? My male life (as wonderful as it is) is unremarkable and boring. Basically, no on cares about who I am and that’s just fine with me 🙂

On a related note, you can usually ask your bank or credit card company for a duplicate card with a different name on it. Some t-girls have a credit card for her and one for him.

As for my ID, I have only needed to show my ID twice when out en femme and that was to enter a bar. Since I rarely go to bars this isn’t an issue but like using my credit card, no one is going to remember my name… or care who I really am. Superman is Superman, no one cares about Clark Kent, you know?

As for using the restroom, if there is a family restroom available I will use that, but if not, I will use the ladies room. This has never been an issue for me.

Love, Hannah

Have a question for me?  Oh yes you do.  Ask me here!

How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love my Body

by Hannah

Once I stopped fretting about my shoulders, I happily went shopping for a few dresses that I had always wanted to wear but never had the courage to do so. I took my new dresses and confidence to my photo shoot from July and had an amazing day.

I love this dress, and I love these photos, but I am wondering if this girl needs some cleavage? 😉 I wear forms and I like the shape they give me but it might be fun to have a little more… oomph 🙂

Love, Hannah

From Concealing to Revealing

by Hannah

When I first started to fully dress I looked for clothes that would minimize some of my features. I found a new appreciation for layering and how contouring could downplay some of my more masculine facial features. When I started to go out of the house, I did my best to blend in instead of standing out.

But somewhere along the way in my (sigh) journey I stopped caring. I cared less about blending in and embraced my height and the fact that I am transgender and everyone who sees me or interacts with me knows I am transgender. I am going to stand out, so I may as well wear the stilettos and the bright pink dress.

But as confident as I was, I still avoided certain styles, namely dresses that revealed more of my shoulders than I was comfortable with. Spaghetti straps were a no-no. But a few months ago I had an epiphany. Global pandemics can do that to you. I decided that I was holding myself back, and I was tired of it.

So I bought the dresses I wanted to wear and I have never looked back. I wore the dress that kind of inspired this whole new way of thinking for a photo shoot in June and I wore several more of them for a shoot last month.

I have been doing more shopping online than I normally do. Again, a global pandemic can do that to you, but a dress kept popping up as a suggestion. I thought the dress was super cute but I thought I couldn’t pull it off as it was a little more revealing than what I normally wore.

But then I thought the hell with it and clicked “add to cart”.

A couple weeks later I wore it for a photo shoot and I would love to share some of the photos from that day. I hope you like them and I hope we all can overcome these invisible barriers in our lives.

Love, Hannah

Happy National Underwear Day!

by Hannah

Apparently today is National Underwear Day, so, uh, happy National Underwear Day for those who celebrate.

On one hand, I look at clothes as fabric that cover our bodies and there’s really no logical reason to genderize them in any way. On the other hand…. OMG, is there anything more feminine than panties?

I’d be lying if I said that selecting my panties for the day wasn’t one of my favorite moments. I love doing this because it represents me being comfortable with my gender identity. For too long I was afraid of wearing what I wanted to wear.

I would like to take a moment to recognize some of my favorite places to buy panties and lingerie. I support these business and I hope you do too!

Let me know if I am missing anyone!

Lingerie for Girls Like Us

The Breast Form Store

En Femme

Homme Mystere

Glamour Boutique

Xdress

Allies

Allure Lingerie

Glamorous Corset

Third Love

Love, Hannah

Shockingly Bold

by Hannah

When getting your makeup done, it’s helpful to be prepared with what you are looking for. Are you looking for a everyday look? Are you getting your makeup done for a special event?

When I am getting a makeover, whether it is for a photo shoot for for going out, I always tell my stylist that I am looking for BOLD. Thick, dark eyeliner, bright red lips, lashes…

I like the boldness because, well, I think I can pull it off. I also like the boldness because I am going to stand out regardless, so I may as well go all the way. High stilettos, head-turning dress, so I may as well have makeup to die for.

I have been going out for a long time (or at least it seems that way) and I have been everywhere from cafes to gas stations to very nice restaurants to a church. Sometimes what I do and where I go match my makeup in the sense that what I am doing could be considered bold. In fact, there are some things I do that I never thought I would have the courage to do, but here I am.

A few months ago I had posted a selfie in a public bathroom and it went viral on Twitter for all the wrong reasons. My photo was retweeted and commented on and sparked a rather hostile “conversation” about transwomen using the ladies room. It was a pretty terrible thing to experience.

At first I didn’t realize I was being attacked. The first comment from the harassers was something along the lines of “shockingly bold”. I replied, “Thank you!” to this person. Of course, after checking out the profile of the person who commented I realized that it was not a compliment. When I first read it, I interpreted it as them being… impressed? that I as a t-girl was not only out of the house, but doing something normal, like taking selfies in the ladies room.

In my defense, it was easy to misinterpret this comment. But I am not in the habit of defending or explaining what I do or who I am to haters.

I found myself thinking about this experience the other day. We can’t control or change how someone sees us or what they say to us. But we can control how we react. We can choose how to respond, if we chose to respond at all. Naively, I assumed they were complimenting me. That is how I chose to interpret their comment. I was way off, but that was my reaction. Perhaps that says something about my ego, but I digress.

I decided long ago that I can’t change someone’s mind, their attitude, or what is in their heart. I can tell them that transwomen are women, I can tell them to leave me alone… but none of this works.

If I walk down the street or through the mall, and someone points or calls me a slur I just ignore them. They are trying to provoke me, they are trying to make me angry, they are trying to hurt me any way they can, they are trying to get me to respond. It’s up to me if I let them get to me.

Of course, this is easier said than done, and sometimes this does get to me, but I certainly don’t turn my head when someone calls me a… well, you know.

I heard someone say that it’s not what they call you, it’s what you respond to, and God, they are so right. Be bold, even shockingly so. For yourself. For no on else.

Love, Hannah