How It Starts

Good morning!

I know some people visit this site to talk about panties and look at photos and ask for help finding heels that fit. I get it. I write a lot about lingerie and clothes and I post a LOT of pictures.

And! I also write a lot about the importance of mental health and how being non-cis can impact that.

Today’s post is about legislation, our mental health and, well, stuff like that. If you have no interest in heavy topics like this, then you probably should stop reading right now. If you feel like commenting or sending me an email about this post, then please make it constructive.

The purpose of this post is to check in with people like us who are being impacted by recent laws. Although this post discusses politics, this is not meant to be a political discussion. Does that make sense?

I promise that my next post will (probably) be less intense. 🙂




It’s one thing to not to be understood. I don’t understand the whys of who I am either. There probably isn’t any tangible reason for why I am the way I am. And really, that’s totally okay.

It’s another thing to not be accepted. This usually hurts, even if it’s just a little bit. To have a part of yourself that someone is unable to accept can be painful. However, on some level… I get it. Being anything other than cis gender is a lot for some people to process and accept. This is our journey, our identity. No one else’s. It’d be nice if we had some company along the way but we must be able to go on this adventure alone, if needed.

There is also being hated. I don’t *really* understand hating someone that isn’t hurting anyone. I am transgender and I am not going to harm you. I am not going to bother you. I am simply existing and I guess for some people that’s a perfectly acceptable and justified reason to hate me. I am not an abomination or anything so horrible.

Finally, there is being attacked. This happens in many ways. Verbally, physically, emotionally, and mentally. One makes a choice to go out of their way to cause harm. It’s a conscious decision. This takes effort.

Violence isn’t limited to just physically or psychologically harming someone. You can cause harm on a social level, such as denying access to medical care or social services. This almost always happens on a political level. Like crossdressing itself, this takes a lot of time, and money, and effort. It takes a committed group of people determined to harm another group of people.

Again, can we please not turn the comments into a political discourse?

There’s no shortage of anti-LGBTQAI+ legislation being discussed or having recently passed. I’m sure if I wanted to put myself into a spiral of depression and hopelessness I could find dozens of recent attempts to pass laws that deny basic rights to the LGBTQAI+ community. I do want to touch on bill that is gathering a lot of steam in Florida that is being referred to the ‘Don’t Say Gay’ bill.

“But Hannah! I’m not gay, I’m not even trans! I just wear panties! This doesn’t affect me!” you may be thinking. Please reconsider. Even if this law doesn’t impact you on a personal level, it harms our community (and yes, I believe that someone who wears panties is indeed part of the LGBTQIA+ community) AND it sets a precedent and becomes a slippery slope for anyone that isn’t cis gender or heterosexual.

Do you think the average congressperson cares about the difference between someone who is transitioning and someone who wears lingerie in their own home? Yes, WE might understand the nuances of a closet crossdresser and someone who is on estrogen, but for many people running the country, there’s probably no difference. There are those in charge who would love to stop any sort of hormone therapy or protection for trans people as well as making it illegal for a boy to wear girl clothes.

Don’t believe me? Let’s revisit this in a few years.

I am reminded of the poem by Martin Niemoller:

First they came for the Communists. And I did not speak out. Because I was not a Communist. Then they came for the Socialists. And I did not speak out. Because I was not a Socialist. Then they came for the trade unionists. And I did not speak out. Because I was not a trade unionist. Then they came for the Jews. And I did not speak out. Because I was not a Jew. Then they came for me. And there was no one left. To speak out for me.

I don’t think it’s unrealistic to paraphrase that poem to something along the lines of this:

First they came for those who have transitioned. And I did not speak out. Because I have not transitioned. Then they came for the drag queens. And I did not speak out. Because I do not do drag. Then they came for people who were non-binary. And I did not speak out. Because I am not non-binary. Then they came for the crossdressers. And I did not speak out. Because no one knows I am a crossdresser. Then they came for me. And there was no one left. To speak out for me.

‘Don’t Say Gay’ is just one of the active or recent bills that focus on anyone that isn’t straight or cis. Again, I could list more examples but really, isn’t just one attempt chilling and scary enough?

As far as I am aware, there isn’t anything like this being discussed here in Minnesota. But again, attempts like this create precedent. If something like this is passed in Florida, it’s likely another state will push for a similar law. This is how it starts. It’s dangerous to ignore legislation like this.

Attempts like these depress, anger, and frustrate me. But I can’t imagine how this impacts someone who is directly affected by legislation like this.

I know this website gets visitors from all over the world, so if you are living in a state, a community, a country where laws like this have passed, or are trying to be passed, how are you doing? What do you want the rest of us to know? Please drop a comment and stay safe.

Love, Hannah

13 thoughts on “How It Starts

  1. From my understanding the Florida legislature dropped that from a vote so it will not be voted on.
    You are right though and I truly don’t understand why politicians feel they must target a group to garner votes from a small percentage of people
    Both sides do this and it should be that our politicians should be working to improve all our lives not to pick an choose which’s ones are more important than the other
    Over the last few years I’ve found myself more independent than identifying with any party as it seems they have no interest but their own interests and their power
    As a trans person I’m just who I am and like you say I don’t want to harm or bother anyone I just want to be me.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You are correct saying political parties are interested in their own agenda: power, and most of all, money. They pretend to care about the poor people, etc., but merely want those votes every two and four years and don’t give a damn about them the rest of the time. I always say what is fair is fair – we need to be reasonable and look at both sides as well, since one side should not be going too far with pushing their agenda on the other side. Works both ways!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I just read the bill, which was wrongfully named by the opposition. Let’s be reasonable – are elementary aged children old enough to really know what these gender issues mean? I would not want my kids and grandchildren to learn about sex education and gender issues until they are in at least junior high school, if not high school. I didn’t learn about these issues when I was very, and if I had been, I would have probably been a confused kid and would have had to discuss these things with my parents, which would have been quite embarrassing for them and me, at that age Again maturity is the key word here – we do not want to jump the gun!


  3. There was a time, successful politicians were about promoting inclusiveness and good policies for the nation but that seem to have changed for the worst. In desperate times, sadly, too many abandon principals over survival instincts. What used to be about uniting a nation has now become tribal war. What frighten me the most is that, it is so much easier for politicians to create divisiveness, fear, misinformation and blame to win support. Have we all so quickly forgotten what fomented genocide in our history?

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Hannah,.one of your finest posts.
    And the poem you quote explains the way bigotry works. People like us should be upset at the way trans people are treated.
    But it’s not just about us.
    We have to be just as genuinely upset at all the other minorities who are despised or dismissed. Homeless, unemployed, whatever.
    It’s called acceptance and having everyone’s back. Everyone’s.
    I expect their support and it only works both ways.


  5. It’s not just what they are attaching, but the means that they are starting to use as a method to enforce then now – citizens suing other citizens. That started in the abortion legislation in TX, but we are seeing it applied to other topics – teaching subjects in school, LGBTQ+ issues, etc.


  6. From Wikipedia:


    LGBT youth are more vulnerable, so Republicans, yes Republicans, want to pick on them even more?

    Not surprising from the same party that has opposed public health measures and vaccinations so that their supporters are significantly more likely to die from Covid-19. And now they should have the power to make laws that are even more adverse to LGBT youth?

    These attempted laws are not based on science or what is best for kids, they are based on bigotry and ignorance.

    As to Amy’s comments, I knew I wanted to cross-dress at 6 or 7 years old. I wanted to be the boy who got to dress as a girl for Halloween. Yes, there should be discussions of these issues at young ages, because around one in twenty of the kids in those classes fall into the LGBT category.

    Well done again, Hannah.


    1. The software didn’t allow me to paste the Wikipedia info, nor the link, but here is the topic name, “Suicide among LGBT Youth”


  7. Won’t say who it is but we all know who it is.This group wants it to be their God,their religion, their way.They are always right according to them.I don’t think they like anything or anyone that’s not them.The leaders, only thing missing is the white hood.RESIST..This is not the country we want .Is it?


  8. Studies have shown that people make decisions on emotion not on logic or data. In fact arguing with data has just the opposite effect. Hatred is a very strong emotion born out of fear. We have a current group of politicians that understand this very well. So they use fear to generate hatred then stand against it so they get elected. The problem is that those emotions do not stop in the election booth they create a perception that has a life of its own.

    Your comment “There is also being hated. I don’t *really* understand hating someone that isn’t hurting anyone” is so spot on. People generate this hated for their own advantage.

    I wish I knew the answer of how to solve this, unfortunately I do not see it getting better anytime soon. I think the best we can do is don’t let us be the ones doing the hating and hope kindness wins in the end. I guess make sure you vote against hatred and fear.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. I understand your feelings about the legestration in Florida. but you might want to check the wording. It might just be that they want to remove the the lable of the term GAY from the legal or the general speaking the word gay.(I’M NOT FROM THE USA BUT CANADA) The legal wording is as much important as they what they want to say but they do not know how to say it. the people in the gov. need help to write some of these law’s but they don’t know how to do it, yo need to ask for assistance from other countries that have these kind of laws they can help.


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