Missing the Point

I will never claim to speak for the ENTIRE t-girl or crossdressing or non-binary or transgender community.

I will never try to either. I think it’s insane to think that anyone COULD or that anyone DOES.

I do write about a lot of different things. My writings generally fall into a few different categories of fashion (not that I think I am fashionable, but I love writing about clothes and doing reviews), activism (mostly legislation targeting or protecting the trans community) advice (or my attempt at it), and just random thoughts.

What I write about is an effort to be helpful or relatable. I know it’s a little shallow to write 800 words about shoes but I like to think raving about a stiletto is relatable to some of us. Writing about thoughts I have when I am out en femme, whether it is being paranoid of being seen by someone or reflecting on how scared and brave I feel can also be relatable.

At the same time there are worlds of things I don’t write about when it comes to identifying as transgender. I don’t talk about side effects of estrogen or how lengthy of a process it is to work with an insurance company in regards to gender confirming surgery. These subjects are important but I have zero experience in these examples so I let more knowledgeable people handle these topics.

I also know that no matter what I write about I will, well, annoy some of you. When I write about lingerie I get emails about how shallow I am. When I write about laws that negatively impact the trans community the emails ask me to stop being depressing and to write about lingerie.

The point is that I don’t try to make everyone happy. I am not intentionally trying to anger anyone, either. I just write about whatever I am thinking about or feeling or doing and move on.

This isn’t to say comments and emails aren’t helpful when it comes to shaping my website, mind you. I love (constructive) feedback.

However, I do wonder from time to time wonder if I am missing the point, or rather, missing A point.

What I mean is that sometimes when I write about, oh, I don’t know, how much I love panties, sometimes I get emails that tell me I am trivializing the life of a trans woman. On the flip side I’ll blog about how exhausting it can be to see so many laws that are an attempt to hurt the transcommunity and soon I get emails that tell me that crossdressing is supposed to be fun and I shouldn’t focus on legislation that allows a doctor to refuse medical care to someone like us.

Again, there’s nothing I can write about that makes everyone happy and it would be foolish and dishonest (to myself) if I were to try.

BUT!

Does anyone ever visit this site and think to themselves that I am completely missing the point of something? Or that I write about being bi-gender but never talk about an aspect that impacts you?

If so, drop me a line or comment below.

Love, Hannah

11 thoughts on “Missing the Point

  1. “I will never claim to speak for the ENTIRE t-girl or crossdressing or non-binary or transgender community.

    I will never try to either. I think it’s insane to think that anyone COULD or that anyone DOES.”

    Of course you don’t. I don’t either and I don’t know of anyone who does. I am a woman who happens to be transgender among a lot of other adjectives. Sure, I don’t find some of your writings to be of much interest to me. Like writing about lingerie. I used to fantasize about wearing panties and bras all the time but now, they’re just clothes for me. Heck, I also used to fantasize about the swishiness of a French Maid’s skirts brushing at the tops of my legs… Okay, I still do but…

    I also love clothes. Our styles are very different. When I was starting my transition I spent way more than I could afford, buying so many things at Nordstrom Rack and other places. I was like a kid in a candy store! These days I often wear skinny jeans, a suitable top (depending on what I’m going to do that day), and likewise, a jacket or coat, probably with tennis shoes (pinkish). I don’t wear any makeup except very occasionally lipstick.

    But I also love getting dressed up to go out for dinner or other such things. I’m going to a friend’s daughter’s wedding in July and already have my dress ready to go. Can’t wait!

    I think it’s terrific that crossdressers like you exist and find satisfaction of their gender dysphoria and life contentment. Who would I be to cast aspersions toward what another trans person does or doesn’t do?

    Sometimes I wish to add a comment to one of your posts but I hesitate. I don’t want to come off as the know-it-all in the room, know what I mean? Whatever I do add simply comes from a desire to help.

    Thank you for all your writings. They take lots of time, I’m sure.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Thank you Hannah for being a middle of the road representative in our diverse community. You are never at the extremes but do touch on daily points that many of us can relate to. I find you to be a constant welcome voice for all of us regardless of where we exist on the LGBTIQ or CIS Spectrum. I look forward to your blog each day. Please continue with your excellent sharing. Marg Produe

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Hello, Ms. McKnight, and thank you for all of your posts Thanks for this whole forum of yours, in fact! I feel that you supply appropriate views and valuable information in a very refreshing way.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Two observations (with requests for comments):
    1). Not to oversimplify, but . . . It seems most of the wondrous “T-universe” falls into two very (binary?) time-worlds: “BI” (Before Internet), and “AI” (After Internet).

    in BI time: Many of your older MN T-Girls blog followers, can recall the information-desert that was. “T” thoughts and “CD” behaviors felt singular, secretive, deviant, and shameful. We searched the dark corners of med libraries, news clippings, B-grade want ads, and sealed plastic sleeves in the back room of Shinder’s Magazines. Useful info was rare, isolating, and frequently wrong.

    Now, in AI time (after the Big Bang of the WWW) we see that the T-universe is relatively-common, diverse, and infinite. Useful info is (however) saturated, overwhelming, and frequently contradictory.

    So . . . Comments from Hanna? And especially, you “Others”?

    2). For one who understands some of BI times, our (beloved/bifurcated) Hanna/Him personas seem (remarkably, admirably, perhaps enviously) free (or well.adapted) from tho big T demons Guilt & Shame. Congrats! And while we know that those younger T folks with only AI time behind the wheel — do not have it easy — they are clearly of a different Guilt & Shame era. Best wishes!

    Still, some of we older generation T girls and CD girls carry deep scars of BI times Guilt & Shame.

    So . . . What useful experiences and suggestions do Hanna and others have: For healing or accepting this G & S? For finding an older or experienced therapist who specializes in mature T or CD issues (in MN area)?

    We look forward to all your comments.
    And thanks for your good work.

    Lauren S.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Nothing wrong with what your doing here, like some I don’t read or comment on all your post
    As a gender fluid girl most of your post are quite interesting but some I’m just like, I will pass on that one today
    The trans community is very diverse and thus your blog fits right in.
    So keep it up

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Hi Hanna

    All Transgender women’s lives are about shoes, relationships, panties, politics, makeup, family, hair styles, support, parties, dresses, etc. This is true for all women.

    You are exactly on point. It is much more interesting reading about subjects that the writer is passionate about then what they think others want to read. So just do you.

    Jodi

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Of course not – how could you possibly comment on every viewpoint? As Jodi says above, just write about what you are passionate about or what interests YOU!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Just be you ! I love your site your commentary! We have to learn to give the tolerance we ask for. We should do the following: If the comments speak to you, great! If not move on to the next topic.
    Steff

    Liked by 1 person

  9. I have always held to the opinion that if you are getting criticism from both ends of the spectrum you are probably doing the right thing and generally much closer to the truth than extremists ever are or ever can be.

    Liked by 2 people

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