Depending on where you are on your journey of gender identity and your wardrobe collection, you might have a femme name. It’s obvious why we have femme names. It’s a little weird to wear a cute dress and spend an hour on our makeup and introducing ourselves as Frank. I mean, you do you obviously but I was at a point in my life when it simply felt weird to look at myself and have a boy name when I was wearing my wig and makeup. The wig and makeup were the breaking point, if you will. I could call myself by my boy name when I was wearing panties or lingerie, but once I strutted across the line of makeup and wigs my reflection screamed GIRL and anything, especially my boy name seemed… well, it wasn’t a good fit.
My name comes from the Japanese word ‘onnagata’ which means “woman role”. At one point in Japanese theater women were not allowed to be on stage so the roles were played by men.
Essentially the word is essentially a female impersonator. Early on in my social media days I needed a last name to register for forums and websites. I used “Hannah Gotta” which more or less rhymed with ‘onnagata’. “Gotta” was never meant to be my “last name” but it was just something to type in that field. It was a few years until I adopted ‘McKnight’ as my last name. There’s no real story for McKnight other than it’s the name of a street in Saint Paul and I thought “Hannah McKnight” sounded good.
Our names can be a variation of our boy names. Some of us go by the name our parents were considering if they had a daughter instead of a son (but they did anyway). Some of us have names that we simply liked and thought were beautiful. We all have stories for our names, but at what point did you realize you needed and wanted a femme name?